Dreams and disappointments


All that time planning and dreaming about your wedding day or a christening, and now it can’t happen as you expected.

Can the wedding go ahead?

All you actually need at a wedding is the bride and groom, a minister and two witnesses, so your wedding can go ahead in this very simple way.  Your vicar will make sure you have a very special service.  You can then consider organising a marriage blessing in a year’s time, which can be just as special and significant. Talk to your vicar about your thoughts.  

What about the banns?

Banns do need to be read three times during regular services, which at the moment are not taking place. If you have already had your banns read three times, the wedding must take place within three months of the final set of banns being read. In some cases, you could be married without banns by using a Common Licence or a Special Licence, so do talk to the vicar as soon as possible about what to do whether you are going ahead with your original date or thinking of postponing your big day. Talk to your vicar for the latest local advice

What if I do decide to cancel?

If you cancel a church wedding, the fees are fully refundable.

Can I postpone?

Talk to your vicar about available dates later in the year as soon as you can. The vicar will be juggling lots of requests at this time, so do talk to them for help.

Here are some prayers for you as that special day approaches

For thinking about your decision

Loving God,
Surround us this day with your presence;
Be with us in our disappointment and help us to be wise
As we re-think our wedding plans.
Sustain us in our love for one another,
And hold all whom we love in your great love.

For a couple whose wedding you can’t attend

Loving God,
Be close to those I love this day,
Especially xxxx and xxxx as they begin their new life together.
May they know joy and hope,
be surrounded by love,
And may their marriage be life-giving and life-long
In all the years ahead.

Can the christening still go ahead?

You may have been planning this special day for months and are now worried about what to do. If your christening was to be part of main Sunday worship it will now not take place in that way. Talk to your vicar about how you can have a small and simple service with just the godparents, with all hygiene and distance guidelines in place.

However, you may decide to postpone, which means that family and friends who were going to come and celebrate with you as a family won’t be gathering. You will all be disappointed.

You could light a candle online on that day and say a prayer with your family for your child. 

Contact the vicar for a new date as soon as you can, and look forward with hope.  Remember that your child is special to you and to God, and the vicar and church will be praying for you.

There are lots of prayers on our dedicated Christenings website that you can use as well as up to date information and practical ideas.